“I saw myself as someone who could manage on my own—someone who coped by staying busy, going for a run, or diving into work. That approach had always worked for me in the past.
“But losing our baby made me realise that some things are simply too heavy to carry alone.”
It’s Men’s Mental Health Week, and we’re shining a light on the vital work Petals’ counsellors do to support men — as well as women — after the loss of a baby.
Our specially trained counsellors provide a safe, confidential space where bereaved parents, whether alone or as a couple, can express thoughts and feelings they may not be able to share anywhere else.
In this week’s blog, Petals client and supporter Niall shares his story, opening up about his experiences of loss and how counselling helped him begin to process and heal.
Niall’s Story:
My wife and I know first hand the devastating pain of losing a baby. We’ve experienced this heartbreak not once, but twice. These were some of the darkest and most challenging times in our lives, and navigating the overwhelming grief felt impossible at times.
Thankfully, we found Petals; their compassionate and professional counselling service provided us with a lifeline during our darkest days.
In particular, our counsellor, Katie, was an absolute rock for us. She created a safe and understanding space where we could process our grief, learn to cope with our loss, and begin to find a path forward. Katie’s support was invaluable, and we will forever be grateful for the kindness she showed us.
This year, I ran the London Marathon as my way of saying thank you to Petals and to Katie for the incredible support they gave us. It was also an incredible opportunity to raise awareness about baby loss and the vital work that Petals does in helping other families – and Dads in particular – facing similar heartbreak.
Every step I took was in memory of our precious babies and in support of all those who need Petals’ compassionate care.
Running has always been my way of processing thoughts, a space where I could work through emotions in solitude. Training for the London Marathon became more than just a physical challenge – it was a journey of understanding and healing.
But true healing came with Petals.
Their counselling gave me the safe space I didn’t know I needed, not just to talk with a professional, but to open up to my wife.
Through Petals, we found a way to share our grief, rather than carry it alone.
I was incredibly proud to wear the Team Petals jersey and to support such an important cause. It meant a lot to be part of something that makes a real difference.
Before this experience, I wouldn’t have considered counselling.
I saw myself as someone who could manage on my own—someone who coped by staying busy, going for a run, or diving into work. That approach had always worked for me in the past.
But losing our baby made me realise that some things are simply too heavy to carry alone.
It taught me that there’s real strength in seeking support. Speaking to someone helped me make sense of emotions I couldn’t even name at the time. It gave me the space to process what I was feeling, without needing to have all the answers.
Counselling wasn’t something I immediately turned to, but knowing it was available gave me reassurance. It became a space where I could reflect and speak openly, but more importantly, it gave my wife and me a way to talk about something that was incredibly hard to put into words.
I wanted to be there for her, to support her in the best way I could—but I didn’t always know how.
Counselling helped us find a shared language for our grief. It wasn’t about fixing anything; it was about understanding each other better and learning how to carry the loss together, rather than separately.
For any man going through baby loss and unsure about counselling, I’d say this: it’s not about being weak—it’s about being open to support, for yourself and for the people you love. You don’t have to go every week or have all the answers. Just knowing it’s there can make a difference.
